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A Writing Spell: Honoring Your Many Selves
March 1, 2021
A Writing Spell: Honoring Your Many Selves
March 1, 2021
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March 1, 2021
An 11-Line Poetry Spell For Healing
March 1, 2021
An 11-Line Poetry Spell For Healing
March 1, 2021
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March 1, 2021
How To Write Powerful Poetry Spells
February 28, 2021
How To Write Powerful Poetry Spells
February 28, 2021
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February 28, 2021
Here Is Your Scorpio Homework This Season
October 25, 2020
Here Is Your Scorpio Homework This Season
October 25, 2020
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October 25, 2020
3 Transformative Life Lessons Scorpio Teaches Us
October 25, 2020
3 Transformative Life Lessons Scorpio Teaches Us
October 25, 2020
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October 25, 2020
Restorative Grief: Letters To The Dead
October 23, 2020
Restorative Grief: Letters To The Dead
October 23, 2020
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October 23, 2020
A Santa Muerte Rebirth Ritual + A Tarot Writing Practice
October 6, 2020
A Santa Muerte Rebirth Ritual + A Tarot Writing Practice
October 6, 2020

Looking for some October magic? Below I’ve included two rituals — one a Santa Muerte rebirth ritual dreamed up by Leza Cantoral (witch, author, and editor of Clash Books) and published in Light Magic for Dark Times and one a tarot writing practice from The Magical Writing Grimoire.

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October 6, 2020
Witches, Here Are The New Books You Need
November 14, 2019
Witches, Here Are The New Books You Need
November 14, 2019
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November 14, 2019
3 Dream Magic Rituals And Practices
November 12, 2019
3 Dream Magic Rituals And Practices
November 12, 2019
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November 12, 2019
How To Use Tarot Cards for Self-Care
November 11, 2019
How To Use Tarot Cards for Self-Care
November 11, 2019
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November 11, 2019
A Review of Caitlin Doughty's 'Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?'
October 25, 2019
A Review of Caitlin Doughty's 'Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?'
October 25, 2019

Over the past several years as Doughty, has continued to travel the world to give talks and educate folks on the wonders of death, she found that her favorite part of these talks came in the Q&A portion. It was not just the opportunity to get to hear what she calls “people’s deep fascination with decaying bodies, head wounds, bones, embalming, funeral pyres—the works”—that the most direct and provocative questions about death came from young children. 

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October 25, 2019
Nimue, The Deity, Came To Me In A Dream
September 17, 2019
Nimue, The Deity, Came To Me In A Dream
September 17, 2019
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September 17, 2019
Astrological Shadow Work: Healing Writing Prompts
September 9, 2019
Astrological Shadow Work: Healing Writing Prompts
September 9, 2019
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September 9, 2019
The Witches of Bushwick:  On Cult Party, Connection, and Magic
July 23, 2019
The Witches of Bushwick: On Cult Party, Connection, and Magic
July 23, 2019
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July 23, 2019
7 Magical & Inclusive New Books Witches Must Read
May 15, 2019
7 Magical & Inclusive New Books Witches Must Read
May 15, 2019
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May 15, 2019
Working Out As Magic & Ritual: A Witch's Comprehensive Guide
May 14, 2019
Working Out As Magic & Ritual: A Witch's Comprehensive Guide
May 14, 2019
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May 14, 2019
Letters to the Dead: Shadow Writing for Grief & Release
February 8, 2019
Letters to the Dead: Shadow Writing for Grief & Release
February 8, 2019
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February 8, 2019
How to Add Magic to Your Every Day Wellness Routine
February 5, 2019
How to Add Magic to Your Every Day Wellness Routine
February 5, 2019

Stephanie Valente lives in Brooklyn, NY. She has published Hotel Ghost (Bottlecap Press, 2015) and waiting for the end of the world (Bottlecap Press, 2017) and has work included in Susan, TL;DR, and Cosmonauts Avenue. Sometimes, she feels human. http://stephanievalente.com

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February 5, 2019
Ritual: Writing Letters To Your Self — On Anais Nin, Journaling, and Healing
January 31, 2019
Ritual: Writing Letters To Your Self — On Anais Nin, Journaling, and Healing
January 31, 2019
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January 31, 2019
How Rituals Can Help You Gain Confidence
January 17, 2019
How Rituals Can Help You Gain Confidence
January 17, 2019
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January 17, 2019
Hearthcraft & the Magic of Everyday Objects: Reading Arin Murphy-Hiscock's 'House Witch'
January 14, 2019
Hearthcraft & the Magic of Everyday Objects: Reading Arin Murphy-Hiscock's 'House Witch'
January 14, 2019
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January 14, 2019
True to The Earth: Cooper Wilhelm Interviews Kadmus
November 26, 2018
True to The Earth: Cooper Wilhelm Interviews Kadmus
November 26, 2018
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November 26, 2018
Between The Veil: Letter from the Editor
October 31, 2018
Between The Veil: Letter from the Editor
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
Shadow Work with Light Magic for Dark Times
October 31, 2018
Shadow Work with Light Magic for Dark Times
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
2 Poems by Stephanie Valente
October 31, 2018
2 Poems by Stephanie Valente
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
A Poem in Photographs by Kailey Tedesco
October 31, 2018
A Poem in Photographs by Kailey Tedesco
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
Photography by Alice Teeple
October 31, 2018
Photography by Alice Teeple
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
A Simple Spell to Summon and Protect Your Personal Power
October 31, 2018
A Simple Spell to Summon and Protect Your Personal Power
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
November and Her Lovelier Sister
October 31, 2018
November and Her Lovelier Sister
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018
A Spooky Story by Lydia A. Cyrus
October 31, 2018
A Spooky Story by Lydia A. Cyrus
October 31, 2018
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October 31, 2018

4 Classic Books That Gorgeously Explore The Subtleties & Madness of Sexuality

November 30, 2015

BY LISA MARIE BASILE

Sex writing is often a separate conversation from that of craft. I myself have taught Poetics of Sex but have always questioned the segregation of sex writing. Most successful writing is vulnerable and authentic - qualities that often seem intangible and subjective -  so why would sex somehow fall outside those confines?

Sex is part of the human experience, and if we take time to write the human experience well, sex would be like anything else: ordinary, as a cup of tea. It's the presentation of that truth that matters. Below, we compiled four incredibly honest, very human and beautifully written excerpts we loved. They may not be comfortable, but they are true to condition of wanting, lusting, desiring and even sinning. 

Anais Nin once said she was “conscious of a difference between the masculine and feminine treatment of sexual experience," which is one way of exploring sexuality  - its dynamics, its fragility, its physical differences. 

In Playboy, Nabokov explains Lolita, perhaps the most difficult of these books to digest:

“Playboy: Speaking of the very sick, you suggested in Lolita that Humbert Humbert’s appetite for nymphets is the result of an unrequited childhood love affair; in Invitation to a Beheading you wrote about a 12-year-old girl, Emmie, who is erotically interested in a man twice her age; and in Bend Sinister, your protagonist dreams that he is “surreptitiously enjoying Mariette [his maid] while she sat, wincing a little, in his lap during the rehearsal of a play in which she was supposed to be his daughter.” Some critics, in poring over your works for clues to your personality, have pointed to this recurrent theme as evidence of an unwholesome preoccupation on your part with the subject of sexual attraction between pubescent girls and middle-aged men. Do you feel that there may be some truth in this charge?

Nabokov: I think it would be more correct to say that had I not written Lolita, readers would not have started finding nymphets in my other works and in their own households. I find it very amusing when a friendly, polite person says to me—probably just in order to be friendly and polite—“Mr. Naborkov,” or “Mr. Nabahkov,” or “Mr. Nabrov” or “Mr. Nabohkov,” depending on his linguistic abilities, “I have a little daughter who is a regular Lolita.” People tend to underestimate the power of my imagination and my capacity of evolving serial selves in my writings. And then, of course, there is that special type of critic, the ferrety, human-interest fiend, the jolly vulgarian. Someone, for instance, discovered tell-tale affinities between Humbert’s boyhood romance on the Riviera and my own recollections about little Colette, with whom I built sand castles in Biarritz when I was 10. Somber Humbert was, of course, 13 and in the throes of a pretty extravagant sexual excitement, whereas my own romance with Colette had no trace of erotic desire and indeed was perfectly commonplace and normal. And, of course, at 9 and 10 years of age, in that set, in those times, we knew nothing whatsoever about the false facts of life that are imparted nowadays to infants by progressive parents.”
— Playboy

I love what Nabakov has to say because he diminishes the critic's obsession with finding the author's sin and instead says that whatever truth is within a person is going to manifest no matter what, even if the plot changes. That, to me, is letting the honesty run through the work, and I think the below excerpts showcase this duende and unbridled exploration of desire perfectly (not necessarily healthy desire or sex, per se, as Lolita is a story of both desire and non-consent or rape, to some). 

While Nabokov's novel is slightly different in that our lead is the step-father sexually objectifies his young daughter, his writing still explores those nether-realms where the true human condition, no matter how disgusting, is written about with honesty and clarity. 


LOLITA, VLADIMIR NABOKOV
“I recall certain moments, let us call them icebergs in paradise, when after having had my fill of her –after fabulous, insane exertions that left me limp and azure-barred–I would gather her in my arms with, at last, a mute moan of human tenderness (her skin glistening in the neon light coming from the paved court through the slits in the blind, her soot-black lashes matted, her grave gray eyes more vacant than ever–for all the world a little patient still in the confusion of a drug after a major operation)–and the tenderness would deepen to shame and despair, and I would lull and rock my lone light Lolita in my marble arms, and moan in her warm hair, and caress her at random and mutely ask her blessing, and at the peak of this human agonized selfless tenderness (with my soul actually hanging around her naked body and ready to repent), all at once, ironically, horribly, lust would swell again–and 'oh, no,' Lolita would say with a sigh to heaven, and the next moment the tenderness and the azure–all would be shattered.” 

THE LOVER, MARGUERITE DURAS
Hélène Lagonelle’s body is heavy, innocent still, her skin’s as soft as that of certain fruits, you almost can’t grasp her, she’s almost illusory, it’s too much. She makes you want to kill her, she conjures up a marvelous dream of putting her to death with your own hands. Those flour-white shapes, she bears them unknowingly, and offers them for hands to knead, for lips to eat, without holding them back, without any knowledge of them and without any knowledge of their fabulous power. I’d like to eat Hélène Lagonelle’s breasts as he eats mine in the room in the Chinese town where I go every night to increase my knowledge of God. I’d like to devour and be devoured by those flour-white breasts of hers.

I am worn out with desire for Hélène Lagonelle.

I am worn out with desire.

I want to take Hélène Lagonelle with me to where every evening, my eyes shut, I have imparted to me the pleasure that makes you cry out. I’d like to give Hélène Lagonelle to the man who does that to me, so he may do it in turn to her. I want it to happen in my presence, I want her to do it as I wish, I want her to give herself where I give myself. It’s via Hélène Lagonelle’s body, through it, that the ultimate pleasure would pass from him to me.
A pleasure unto death.” 

TROPIC OF CANCER, HENRY MILLER
“When I look down into this fucked-out cunt of a whore I feel the whole world beneath me, a world tottering and crumbling, a world used up and polished like a leper's skull. If there were a man who dared to say all that he thought of this world there would not be left him a square foot of ground to stand on. When a man appears the world bears down on him and breaks his back. There are always too many rotten pillars left standing, too much festering humanity for  man to bloom. The superstructure is a lie and the foundation is a huge quaking fear. If at intervals of centuries there does appear a man with a desperate, hungry look in his eye, a man that would turn the world upside down in order to create a new race, the love that he brings to the world is turned to bile and he becomes a scourge. If now and then we encounter pages that explode, pages that wound and sear, that wring groans and tears and curses, know that they come from a man with his back up, a man whose only defenses left are his words and his words are always stronger than the lying, crushing weight of the world, stronger than all the racks and wheels which the cowardly invent to crush out the miracle of personality. If any man ever dared to translate all that is in his heart, to put down what is really his experience, what is truly his truth, I think then the world would go to smash, that it would be blown to smithereens and no god, no accident, no will could ever again assemble the pieces, the atoms, the indestructible elements that have gone to make up the world.” 

DELTA OF VENUS, ANAIS NIN
“How do I look to him?" she asked herself. She got up and brought a long mirror towards the window. She stood it on the floor against a chair. Then she sat down in front of it on the rug and, facing it, slowly opened her legs. The sight was enchanting. The skin was flawless, the vulva, roseate and full. She thought it was like the gum plant leaf with its secret milk that the pressure of the finger could bring out, the odorous moisture that came like the moisture of the sea shells. So was Venus born of the sea with this little kernel of salty honey in her, which only caresses could bring out of the hidden recesses of her body.” 

In Sex Tags Anais Nin, Henry Miller, Marguerite Duras, Vladimir Nabakov, Lolita, The Lover
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